Mar 18
Watch: Madonna Fan Cosmo's Cranky Video Goes Viral and Gay Twitter Can't Contain Themselves
Kilian Melloy READ TIME: 2 MIN.
A Los Angeles Madonna fan named Cosmo is breaking X (formerly Twitter) with a video calling out exorbitant prices around Madge's concert, and Gay Twitter can't get enough. Cosmo appears in the video with a wealth of tousled blonde locks that Jennifer Coolidge would envy and a voice worthy of Harvey Fierstein.
"Okay, 80 bucks to park the car, like, 10 blocks away," the entrepreneur, who owns clothing store Cosmo's on Melrose, says as the video commences.
"So, I just got my cardio," Cosmo adds, with perfect coming timing. "I need an oxygen tank and a cigarette at the same time."
After the briefest pause, Cosmo dives right back in: "Then they say no bags." Shrugging out of an over-the-shoulder bag, Cosmo asks, "No, is this a big bag? Guys, come on." Surveying the expanse of the black bag – which is rather large, in fact – Cosmo admits, "It is. But these girls" – turning to others off camera – "have little bags, and look. Check them in, no bags."
The camera swings to the side and reveals a stylish woman in a gray suit wielding a black clutch.
"They said you have to have a clear bag," Cosmo continues, as the camera swings back again. "When was the last time you worked at Macy's, bitches? I can't! I just want to see Madonna!!"
"Madonna, what's up?" a voice from off camera asks.
"Madonna, what is going on? You owe me a T-shirt, bitch!" Cosmo wails. "And a lap dance," the stylist adds, as if by way of an afterthought.
Though the video was posted March 15, it was most likely made some time between March 4 and March 11, when Madonna's Celebration Tour was in Inglewood.
Both the message and the manner struck a chord.
Some had fun comparing Cosmo to various celebrities – including the Material Girl herself.
A few people know Cosmo, possibly from the boutiques Cosmo's GlamSquad and Cosmo & Donato.
Others might know Cosmo from the Twitter account Cosmo Queen of Melrose or from Cosmo's YouTube channel.
Soft White Underbelly interviewed the social media phenom earlier this month in a chat in which Cosmo shared their background, talking about a Harlem background and a childhood similar to the movie "Goodfellas," and saying, "My father was, like, in the mob" and "I have a twin brother – he's identical; he's the boy, I'm the girl."
At another juncture, Cosmo recalled being a young child in love with Davy Jones and Donny Osmond – with Mom wanting to arrange for an exorcism. Later still, Cosmo relates wild adventures with celebrities, substance abuse, and rehab.
There, too, Twitter went wild.
Watch the Soft White Underbelly interview with Cosmo below.
Kilian Melloy serves as EDGE Media Network's Associate Arts Editor and Staff Contributor. His professional memberships include the National Lesbian & Gay Journalists Association, the Boston Online Film Critics Association, The Gay and Lesbian Entertainment Critics Association, and the Boston Theater Critics Association's Elliot Norton Awards Committee.
