Utah Men Faced with Loss of Custody Due to State Law

Kilian Melloy READ TIME: 3 MIN.

A male couple in Utah say that the fact that they are gay is a factor in the bureaucracy they face when it comes to taking care of their niece's children.

When the niece of Michael Valdez asked him and his partner Michael Oberg to take in her four children, the men didn't hesitate to provide a loving, stable home while the niece sorted out legal issues stemming from drug-related charges.

But state law says that children cannot be adopted or fostered by cohabiting, unmarried couples, according to a story posted over the weekend by the central utah nespaper The Daily Herald.

Said Valdez, "They'd rather pull them out of a loving, caring home and put them into a foster home."

Continued Valdez, "You walk into our house without anybody here and it's going to be like any other house."

Gabrielle Valdez, Michael's 17-year-old daughter, agreed, saying that home life with her father and his partner is the same as in any other household.

Reputable studies show that children raised by same-sex parents do as well as children raised by heterosexuak couples.

A judge had initially given Valdez custody of the children, but officials requested that the court take custody of the children, or else place the children in the care of Utah's Division of Child and Family Services.

The court did take custody last Friday, and then returned the children to Valdez's custody.

Recounted Valdez, "The judge said, 'I see absolutely no reason why the kids can't stay where they're at,'" Valdez said.

The state law regarding unmarried couples applies to both heterosexual and homosexual couples. Utah Country natives Valdez and Oberg said that if they could marry, they would; however, voters here approved an amendment to the state constitution barring marriage equality.

Meantime, however, the four children-ages ranging from 10 months to 11 years-needed looking after, and their fathers were unable to care for them.

Said Oberg, "It was very difficult to get it going. But we've got the kids situated now. They're comfortable. They're happy."

The state's Division of Child and Family Services had initially been fine with the children staying with their great-uncle and his partner. But then, a DFCS lawyer told the men they would have to surrender custody.

The children have been in the custody of Family and Child Services before, but Valdez said they'd "been through enough without having [to be] split up."

Said Valdez, "That's the major thing, the reason I've agreed to do this for [his niece]."

Sending the children into the system is not guarantee that they will be cared for without being split up. Martie Shannon, DCFS adoption program manager, said, "It just depends on the timing of who is available" to take children in, when it comes to keeping siblings together.

Valdez and Oberg are not only available, they have already opened their door to the young siblings. The question is whether they will be allowed to keep them until their mother or fathers might be able to care for them.

Said Valdez, "I guess we let DCFS and the drug court decide if the mother follows the orders of the court or not."

At that point, the men may face another round of bureaucracy and uncertainty due to the state's law barring fosterage or adoption by unmarried couples.

Said Valdez, "I guess we'll just cross that bridge if and when it comes."

Two states, Florida and Mississippi, expressly forbid fosterage or adoption by gays. Arkansas may add a measure to the 2008 electoral ballot to ban adoption or fosterage by unmarried couples, a measure the Arkansas Family Council wishes to see approved as a means of preventing gay parents from becoming adoptive or foster parents.

Utah bans unmarried couples from adopting or fostering, but allows single parents, including gays and lesbians, to adopt or foster children.


by Kilian Melloy , EDGE Staff Reporter

Kilian Melloy serves as EDGE Media Network's Associate Arts Editor and Staff Contributor. His professional memberships include the National Lesbian & Gay Journalists Association, the Boston Online Film Critics Association, The Gay and Lesbian Entertainment Critics Association, and the Boston Theater Critics Association's Elliot Norton Awards Committee.

Read These Next